Well, I’m pleased to report I made it nearly 3 weeks into the school holidays, before feeling the need to crawl under a duvet/sell The Smalls/emigrate on my own/yell until my head exploded. It’s been gloriously sunny, and they’ve been out and Done Stuff. We’ve not been too restricted, and they’ve spent time with Grandparents and at their school Fun Club (not new school, I should add, it’s still old school. That’s a whole other post. *rolls eyes*).
Yet I don’t know what the hell is up with Noah, but his ability to not hear a word I’m saying, combined with being purposefully disobedient is breaking me down. Combined with the inability for them to be quiet when they awake in the mornings when their GroClock “wakes up”, is nearly killing me.
I whined before about how the fuck was I going to fit in work with childcare with keeping them busy with time to myself with not dying. Turns out, it’s perfectly possible, but if you were looking to maintain your sanity at the same time, then you’ve got another thing coming.
Truth is, I can’t give them what they need. I don’t have the physical strength any more. I can’t give them patience; I don’t seem to have any left. I can’t give them love; my mind and body shut down and I can’t get out of myself. I can’t give them Fun Things To Do; they show no interest in any of it. I’ve just put them outside and am refusing to let them back in the house for at least 10 minutes. Noah has been restless and driving me nuts. Isaac was slumped in front of the tv. Again.
Wouldn’t you know it, less than 10 seconds outside (on the ginormous trampoline, no less) and one of them is already crying.
Is it a phase? A stage?
(By the way, in the short time it took me to type, they’ve both asked to come back in already. Wtf? You didn’t even WANT to be cooped up in the teeny tiny lounge.)
Is it another “Terrible Twos”, only it’s “Head Stabbing Threes” and “Please God Make It Stop Fours”? And am I to assume this bullshit will continue pretty much until I lose my marbles and have no recollection of anything going on around me? (I’m thinking maybe 96, possibly 97. 97 is a Good Age.) Unfortunately (I say, thinking back to a previous, recent post), it feels like an answer to not losing my sanity is to figure out how to be That Mom. Despite this, I found myself agreeing with the comments on the post.
Which, I’m pretty sure, puts a mahoosive spanner in the works.
Sometimes I wonder if I need my own Time Out. I try not to do it to them too much, as I’m not entirely sure it works anymore, or is even necessary for the times when they are driving me batshit. Hence, throwing them in the garden as a fairer alternative to this, at least they get to vent some of their energy, they have fun, and they can calm down.
But what happens when it stops being sunny?
Oh my god I’m laughing so fucking hard, because I swear to God as soon as I finished typing that sentence, it started raining.
Sooooo…I guess I’m about to find out the answer to my question, eh?
~~~
(Bubble Guppies was on. All was right with the world for 30 minutes.)
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OMG, I'm glad it's not just Jay that has selective deafness. He's driving me absolutely INSANE with his constant defiance and deliberately malicious treatment of Matty. They play nicely for a bit, and as soon as I relax, Jay does something nasty to hurt Matty. I have no idea who has taught him such things, or where he gets it from, but I hate it. And the early mornings – don't even get me started. They get up at the crack of dawn, then moan all day that they're tired…
We need to get together, talk tactics and eat cake. I'm not far away, you have my number and I'm on and off twitter and facebook all day – if you want me, I'm here (with 2 crazy boys in tow…)
Mahoosive hugs. xxx
I could have written this post myself. It's like you're in my head. I know this doesn't help you, but know that some else gets it and has thought (recently) THE SAME EXACT THOUGHTS.