Dear Facial Orifice Fluid and Phlegmy Hacking Cough
Seriously? 2 weeks now? Piss ye the fuck off.
Yours, PhlegmWad
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Dear Patience
Where have you gone?!? I miss you! I mean, I know we never got on so well, but that doesn’t mean I never loved you. I’d love to have you back again in my life one day. Don’t be a stranger, ok? Come back. And hurry up about it.
Yours, Impatiently
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Dear Isaac
I love you. You’re my lovely little boy! You’re so cute! Look at you with your big puppy eyes and stuff. Ahwww!! You know what isn’t cute? SCREAMING AND DEMANDING TO GO WATCH TV/PLAY WITH TOYS WHEN YOU NEED TO EAT YOUR FOOD. Mainly because as the day goes on, you become the grouchiest person EVER. You are a typical bloke; you think with your stomach. I know you haven’t figured that out yet. Which is why I am trying to help you. Seriously, Mama knows best. For real.
Yours, Mom Who Knows More Than You
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Dear Noah
STOP. RUDDY. WHINING.
Love you. You’re a cute kid of mine too. I promise that was not added as an afterthought. Maybe.
Yours, Mom Who Is Sick Of Your Whining
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Dear School Run Traffic
Hey here’s a thought, if we all drive like normal people instead of mutards, we might all get to where we want to go without wanting to ram each other off the road! Wow! Can you imagine that?!? What a wonderful world that would be, eh??!?
Ahh to live the dream.
Yours, Woman Driver Who Does Not Drive Like A “Woman Driver” Otherwise She Would Die
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Dear Reader
If you made it this far, awesome! Head on over to Kat’s place and go read her love letters. Or something. And don’t forget to link up, mmkay?
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Love Dear So and So. Agree with every single one – could have written them all myself (although with my childrens names … )
Me too! Read it for ages but never got round to doing my own… *thumbs up to 3 Bedroom Bungalow*
You are ruddy brilliant my dear! Psst. My house elves only work if you give them biscuits.
NOW you tell me. Well they're not having my fancy ones.
Love these 'm'kay'. Mutards also goes down as the word of the day!
It makes me feel much better shouting "MUTARD" instead of "FUCKTARD" when I've got the boys in the car… ;oD
Love it love it love it, well done m'dear x
*bows* Thanks! x
Mu-tard…not mustard. ;o)
Although, I suspect mustard could drive better.
bwaaahaha… I read really good.
Dear wifey…. get the freakin kettle on.
xx